


Wait For It

by thetraveler



Category: Hamilton - Miranda, Revolutionary War RPF, US Revolutionary War RPF
Genre: American History, Angst, Canon Era, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Sickfic, Soulmate AU, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, fancy party, in both fluff and angst, soulmate!AU, we got some real sock-knocker-offers here, winter ball
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-10
Updated: 2017-01-10
Packaged: 2018-09-14 04:22:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9161194
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thetraveler/pseuds/thetraveler
Summary: Burr felt something in his chest, warm and blossoming. There was something that drew him to this woman like a magnet. His heart decided before his brain could refuse that he would dance with that woman tonight.Or, a Soulmate!au fic I did for a secret santa where Aaron Burr is a lovestruck fool, but so is his other half. Then it gets really sad.The (x)es are illustrations I did to go with it!





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I loVe Theodosia a lot ok  
> Please feel free to leave comments!!

“I declare you, Theodosia Bartow Prevost and Jacques Marcus Prevost, husband and wife!”

The cheering of family and friends was subdued as they took each other’s hands, intertwining their fingers to create the message “W R I T F W R O T E” across their knuckles. Everyone was born with letters tattooed on their knuckles, (ladies on the left hand, gentlemen the right hand, as Theodosia’s grandmother had told her long ago) and when one laced their fingers with their soulmate, it completed a meaningful phrase to them. Neither of them were sure what it meant to them yet, but they were willing to wait and find out, with each other.

They were brought back to the present, “Mister Prevost, I do believe it is due time that you kissed your new bride.” The preacher smiled at the couple.

Jacques gazed adoringly at their hands together, then slid his hand around her waist and brought Theodosia into a tender kiss. When they opened their eyes, flower petals were drifting around them and cheers were still trickling from their family and friends.

“I love you, Jacques Marcus,” she whispered with a small grin.

“I know. I love you too, my darling Theodosia.” His breath was warm as it fell on her face. They squeezed each other closer, sharing soft warmth. The world felt light; the world felt right.

****

Theodosia opened her eyes carefully. From where she was lying in bed, she could see grey morning sky between the branches of the cedar outside her window. She yawned. It was time to start another day.

Marcus had left for Georgia three months ago, kissing her sweetly and inadequately on the cheek before he boarded his carriage. She waved goodbye- he didn’t see it as he drove away. Theodosia sighed and moved on.

Ferris- the butler- had brought breakfast and the mail when she came into the dining room. She tied her dressing robe and took a seat. The children were thankfully still asleep, it seemed. She thanked him and sifted through the letters; a few postcards from Marcus, a letter from her mother, and an invitation. The latter had sparked her curiosity. Setting the others aside, she opened the envelope and read about the event.

Washington had invited her to a “Winter’s Ball” of sorts, some fancy party in the city. Theodosia sat back in her chair. It had been ages since she’d gone to the city, and far longer since she had gone to anything social. She sighed a laugh – if she went, would she even have anything to wear? Taking a bite of eggs, she set the idea aside and read the rest of her mail.

After breakfast, she retired to the study to reply to her mother’s letter. However, Theodosia found herself frequently distracted with thoughts of the ball. She remembered the glimmering eyes, the ringing music, the light warmth of champagne in her belly. This was something she realized she desperately wanted.

Despite having other things that really did need to get done, Theodosia found herself standing in front of her open dresser. Satins and velvets passed between her fingers in pastel greens, rich navies, cherry reds and pale yellows. Her finest gowns; each with special memories of their occasions woven into them. She paused to recollect, before grabbing a hanger and holding the dress against her frame. It was a silk crimson gown that she had made for her 18th birthday. Theodosia was 23 now; but the memories of five years prior flooded back with every bit of vibrancy as the day they had been made. They had made a whole roast pig, apple in its mouth and all, and Marcus had danced with her until her feet were sore. His eyes had shone the brightest she could ever remember that night, and she let herself be taken by their beauty.

“Madam?” Ferris asked. “What are you doing swinging around the dressing room so? And with your old dress?”

Theodosia came back to the present. The butler and two of her children were peeking from the doorway, curiosity riddling their faces. She tiredly listened as her heartbeat slowed in her ears, and with a strange feeling in her heart she knew she could not let this go. Inhaling, she made the decision.

“Ferris, I was invited by George Washington to a Winter’s Ball a fortnight from tomorrow. I... I am going.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> do u everjust, fall in love  
> Please feel free to leave comments!!
> 
> ps. the (x) are illustrations I did ovo

New York City was exactly how she remembered it—but much colder. She’d last come in April, and as it approached November now she shivered under her petticoats and shawls. Theodosia tucked into the doorway of a pub and brought out a slip with the address. Claremont Street, house number 6. Tucking the card back away, she blew hot breath over shaking, icy fingers. She rubbed her palms over the letters on her knuckles (W I F R T), long since having forgotten what they meant to her.

It had been a month since Theodosia had last heard from Marcus. He’s busy, she told herself, he’s fighting hard for this country. He’s fighting for freedom as I go to balls alone. His purpose was charitable, honorable. She had no purpose. That didn’t mean she missed him any less. Theodosia longed for someone to talk to, someone to help with the children, someone to keep her warm in bed. Jacques Marcus wasn’t making the cut.

Just a couple more blocks. She braced herself for the wind again.

Even if Theodosia hadn’t stopped, she would have known the event when she saw it. Lights and music were practically pouring out of every window and door of the building. She gasped at the sight, breath spiraling around her.

“May I have your invitation, ma’am?” The chalet extended a hand and a smile.

“Here it is,” Theodosia said, fishing the envelope from her clutch. She flashed a meek grin, looking past him as he took her invitation.

“Welcome to the Ball, Mrs. Prevost.” He bowed and opened the door.

***

“If you could marry a sister, you’re rich, son.” Burr inclined his head and smirked at the Schuylers, who were crowding around the drink table.

“Is it a question of if, Burr, or which one?” Hamilton chuckled, sauntering off towards them. Aaron shook his head. There was no trouble, it seemed, that Alexander wouldn’t get into.

Then he saw her. At the entrance was the most dazzlingly beautiful woman he had ever laid eyes on. The glitz of the event faded and time slowed, or at least it seemed that way as she looked around the room. Her dress was a rich plum, a perfect complement to her mocha skin and parted ruby lips. Burr felt something in his chest, warm and blossoming. There was something that drew him to this woman like a magnet. His heart decided before his brain could refuse that he would dance with that woman tonight.

[(x)](https://wait-for-it-fic.tumblr.com/post/155284970965)

Burr’s gaze was torn from the beautiful woman in purple as John Laurens approached him with a pat on the shoulder, “Well if it isn’t the prodigy of Princeton college!”

“John, it’s a pleasure to see you again.” He smiled warmly. “You look well.”

“You don’t look to bad yourself, Mr. Burr. Say, what is it were you looking at a second ago that had you so completely enraptured?” The abolitionist quirked an eyebrow.

Aaron looked at his hands, the letters on his fingers (A T O I) yet unmatched with someone. “I had noticed a particularly radiant maiden entering the ballroom and I…” he trailed off, scanning the crowd again for the mysterious beauty.

John playfully poked his chest. “Imagine this, Aaron Burr, the quiet scholar and soldier, falling in love at first sight.” He laughed.

“It’s not like that,” said Burr, swatting away Laurens’ hand with a smirk.

[(x)](https://wait-for-it-fic.tumblr.com/post/155285034060)

“Which one is it?” The curly haired man looked around. “Which fine lady has the honor of Aaron Burr’s desires?” A cheeky wink.

Aaron’s eyes found her in the crowd again. His heart surged with emotion once more as he distractedly said, “The one in the… purple dress…”

She was talking to General Washington, and the two obviously knew each other based on their body language. They must have been talking about something funny- both of them were laughing. Her smile brought joy to Burr beyond words.

“She is, indeed, quite pretty,” said John as he stuck an elbow into Burr’s side. “Come, let us go meet her.”

Even though his heart was pounding, Aaron felt a strange pull in his bosom telling him that this was how it was meant to be. He straightened his attire as they approached the woman and the General.

“General Washington, how good to see you,” said Laurens once they were in earshot.

“Ah, Laurens, Major Burr, how wonderful to see you once more!” George caught them both off guard by tugging them into a firm hug. “You both look well.”

“The same to you sir- if the strength of your embrace is any indication, it would seem you’re a portrait of health!” John straightened his clothes and shook his head in admiration.

“I would have to agree with Mr. Laurens,” Aaron laughed.

“You flatter me. Gentlemen, have you met Theodosia Prevost?” The General indicated towards the woman in purple.

“I don’t believe I’ve had the pleasure,” Burr bowed, taking her hand as she offered it and kissing it, “Theodosia Prevost? My name is Aaron Burr, and believe me, it is a pleasure.” Her dainty fingers felt warm and smooth in his hand, and he noticed with his pulse in his ears the letters on her knuckles, W I F R T. Then, his heart fell as he noticed the gold band on her finger.

Aaron’s vision swam as Laurens introduced himself to her. This wonder, this absolute angel that was quickly consuming his world, this-this woman-- was already married. Her heart belonged to another man. It felt so wrong, when he somehow already knew that his heart belonged so completely to her.

He swallowed and sighed, shaking off the devastation. He could at least share a dance without any harm.  
“If I may ask, how do you two know each other?” Burr inquired, voice almost wavering.

“Oh, the General has been a guest in my home many times. As this wretched war wages forth, he has found comfort in a place he can safely reorganize his thoughts and relax.” Her voice was like honey.

“Indeed, I have attended the Prevost household on many occasions to strategize and rest.” Washington visibly loosened, recounting times he could escape and think.

“And does the lady live here in New York?” Laurens interjected curiously.

“No sir, I reside in New Jersey.” Theodosia inclined her head. “My husband is fighting in Georgia at the moment, so it is only my children and I.”

The absent husband sparked Aaron’s interest. If she was so free to invite guests into her home and she had no romantic attachments immediately available to her, there was a chance. Perhaps he was making something out of nothing, but if there was even the tiniest opportunity of seeing her, illegal or not, he was willing to take his shot for her brilliant light to stay in his life.

Washington took up conversation with Laurens over abolition. This was the chance he needed. Burr steeled himself and bowed deeply.

“Mrs. Prevost, may I have this dance?”


	3. Chapter 3

Theodosia took Burr’s hand and he led her to the middle of the ballroom, her heart pounding. Getting to this moment was an emotional journey.

He introduced himself as Aaron Burr, and her hand tingled where his lips touched them. He was handsome, clean shaven and sophisticated, and his voice sounded how hot chocolate felt when it went down your throat- warm and smooth and rich.

Theodosia was smitten.

This was deeper and more compelling than any love she had known before, an entirely stronger feeling than she’d ever experienced with Marcus. It was as if their souls were tied together, and someone was suddenly yanking the string.

For a fraction of a second before she took Aaron’s hand, Marcus flashed through her mind. His charming courtship, his kind eyes and hands as he made love to her, the light in his smile just before kissing her on their wedding day. His pull wasn’t like this one. This magnetic attraction was so much stronger with this new man, Aaron Burr. She could almost regret letting herself go to this new stranger, then she remembered the last time she had seen Marcus. He was looking away from her as he drove away in a carriage. The man she wanted to know in him was long gone. It was high time she gave another man - this man - a chance.

Burr’s hand felt like it belonged there when it slid around her waist, a warm pressure that she never realized she needed so badly until this moment. Her fingers sat gently on his shoulder, and Theodosia knew that if she concentrated hard enough on those fingertips that she might feel the warmth of his body through his suit jacket. In one final step before they began the dance, they intertwined their fingers.

Something clicked into place, like the final stroke of a painter’s brush or the last piece of a jigsaw. They blinked at each other as they started to sway at the music. Burr and Theodosia both knew that something had just happened. With trepidation, they both looked to their clasped hands.

W A I T F O R I T

***

 

“If I did have to admit one thing, I was awfully confused at how you had seemingly changed the letters I’ve had on my hands since birth.” Theodosia held up her hand towards the ceiling.

“What do you mean, dear Theodosia?” Aaron wrapped one arm around her waist and let the other join hers skyward.

“I always had assumed that I was meant to be with Jacques Marcus. Our phrase was ‘write wrote,’ there was an ‘E.’ Then you came along and now it’s ‘wait for it.’ With an ‘F.’” They let their hands play and tangle together.

 [(x)](https://wait-for-it-fic.tumblr.com/post/155285077260)

“But you see, Mr. Burr, it was always an ‘F.’ I merely thought it was an ‘E’ for my marriage.” Theodosia glanced at her wedding ring where it rested on her bedside table, forgotten.

Aaron’s fingers laced with hers and he planted a kiss on her cheek. “Well, maybe the message still means something.” She turned his head towards him. “After all, he used to write you all the time, and now can you even remember the last time he wrote?”

“You’re cheeky.” Theodosia giggled, then sighed. “I don’t remember the last time he wrote…”

Burr didn’t miss a beat. “Why do you need him to write when I’m here for you?” He nuzzled her shoulder, placing gentle kisses there.

It felt like the first time they had danced all over again. She melted into him and forgot about Marcus.

***

“Good morning, madam, here is the newspaper and your mail.” Ferris set them down next to her plate with a bow.

“Ah, thank you.” She picked up the pile, but at the sight of the first letter her breath stopped midway down her throat. With shaky hands she opened the envelope and read the news.

_Dear Mrs. Theodosia Prevost,_

_It is with great heaviness in my heart that I must inform you of the passing of your husband, Jacques Marcus Prevost. He died of injuries sustained in war on Tuesday, the eighteenth of this month. My prayers are with you and your family._

_General James Wolfe_

 

The paper trembled as she set it next to her breakfast. The breakfast she suddenly didn’t have the appetite for. Dead. Marcus was dead.

“Is everything alright, madam?” Ferris furrowed his eyebrows and gently rest his hand on her shoulder. She let him read the letter.

“Madam, my most heartfelt condolences.” He squeezed her shoulder in support.

Theodosia didn’t know how to feel. She had never felt a love as strongly as she felt with Burr, but it wasn’t like there was nothing between her and her late husband. Late- that was so strange. It hurt to say it that way. She scooched back her chair and let out a sob.

She tried to get a grip. Theodosia needed to be strong for her children. The children- she would have to tell them what happened to their father. That wasn’t going to be an easy conversation. Impossible, in her eyes. Tears flowed once more and she decided she needed the afternoon to… heal before she could face anyone else.

When Burr opened the door he immediately sensed her distress and embraced her. Theodosia curled into him, letting herself go to the devastation. He rubbed her back comfortingly, “Hey, what’s wrong?”

They went inside together and she cried for a little while, wordless. When she was ready, she told him about the letter, about her lingering love for her late husband even though it would never be as powerful as her love for Aaron. Theodosia told him she’d wished she’d known the message before she met Jacques, wished she had been able to wait for it. Wait for him. He rubbed circles into her back and let her cry into his neck until the tears stopped coming out.

The maid had brought tea for them an hour ago when the newly widowed Theodosia had just shown up, now sitting cold to the side. When she entered the room again, Burr nodded for her to get some fresh tea, mouthing a ‘thank you.’ After the maid came back with more, he nudged his guest off of him and placed the steaming drink in her hands.

“Here, this will help you feel better. Have something to drink, darling. I’m so sorry.”


	4. Chapter 4

The flame of a candle is much like sickness, burning fever and slowly destroying its host with every drop of wax. It whittles down the strength of whomever it possesses, incessant and near impossible to fight alone. The only thing that can bring an end to the destruction of a candle’s flame is a harsh gust of air.

Air was something Aaron Burr had wasted, now that he needed it most. Candles and fever were burning in that room, and he was choking on tears. This, not this, it couldn’t be happening, not to him.

Theodosia had taken to her bed earlier in the week, and with each day in bed she grew weaker. Burr was at his wits end -- he had called the nation’s best doctors, nurses, even midwives. They all told him the same thing; his wife was dying slowly, painfully, from stomach cancer. There was nothing they could do, except keep her comfortable as she travelled to the next life.

After a funeral for Jacques Marcus, Theodosia and her family recovered from the loss. Although it was a difficult truth to face, she realized he had been lost to them since he rode away in that carriage.

Burr wasted no time in marrying the love of his life, after having followed the advice his soul impressed on their knuckles. He had waited for it, and finally his chance was there. The wedding was sweet and private, beautiful for the sake of their love and not for the glamor of an economic statement.

Later that year, they had been blessed with a daughter. Taking on her mother’s name and her father’s eyes, the younger Theodosia grew strong and beautiful. Life fell into a happy pattern, and even though Aaron faced adversity and struggles at work, he could come home and be with his family. The peace he found in being with his wife and children was unparalleled. Things were well.

Theodosia Sr. first fell ill 2 years ago, diagnosed at first with pneumonia. She was expected to recover within a week, but it didn’t go away. They tried everything they knew, old medicinal practices and new techniques from Europe, but to no avail. Burr watched as she grew weaker, her energy dwindling like wax dripping from a candle. The end of that candle-- her life-- was going to come soon. He could do nothing but wait for it.

Her hand was clammy in his, slick with sweat but her skin was frigid. Theodosia stared blankly ahead, exhaustion clear in the bags under her eyes and he hollowness of her cheeks. Burr sat on the edge of the bed, gently massaging her hand. Even over the howling wind outside, he could hear her labored breathing. Other than that, the room was deadly silent.

“Aaron? Would you… do something… for me?” With obvious strain, Theodosia tried to lift her head from the pillow.

“Anything in the world, my darling, please tell me what I can do,” Burr said.

She weakly slid her fingers between his. “Ki… kiss me… goodbye…”

 [(x)](https://wait-for-it-fic.tumblr.com/post/155285105860)

The world stopped time as he leaned towards her. The love of his life, the second part of his soul, the woman he had waited for, his everything-- was just about to die. She’d be gone from his life, his stable routine shattered. He didn’t know what he would rely on when her light no longer shone. Theodosia completed him, made him whole in a way that nothing else could.  
Aaron hesitated before kissing her. He couldn’t do this. If he connected their lips, it would mean goodbye forever. She would leave his life and he would be alone. Burr did not want to be alone.

Theodosia sensed his trepidation and leaned towards him. Worry flickered in her eyes, and he felt tears start rolling from his. Suddenly, there was no way that he could be so selfish. He wouldn’t be the one to take away her last happiness. Aaron gently closed the gap between them.

The kiss only lasted a few seconds, but for Theodosia Prevost Burr, it lasted for the rest of her life. She fell back on the pillow looking peaceful, eyes closed. Aaron wanted to shake the life back into her, to see those eyes shine for him once more, hear her voice call his name again. But she was forever gone. He lay down beside her and cried until the sun came up.

Ferris discovered them the next morning. Burr was still holding her hand, now gone cold. The butler surmised the situation and summoned a doctor before waking his mistress’ husband.

“Sir? Sir, you have to get up. Please come downstairs and eat something.”

Aaron rose and remembered, throat and eyes dry. He was beyond the point of raw devastation. He knew it was time to move on.

“Dear Theodosia, sleep forever more. I will see you on the other side. Wait for me.” He held her hand to his and kissed it, one last tear trailing down his cheek.

“Goodbye.”


End file.
